The Kindness of Strangers

Letting Go and Moving Forward (2012-2013)

“Our ‘eviction’ from the Historic Falls Church at the end of May was my most significant personal event of 2012. My son and daughter-in-law attended Sunday morning service in the historic church with me. It would be the last time they could attend services in the church where my son grew up. It was a very emotional time for me, and I signed the guest book with tears in my eyes.

I attended the historic church for 50 years. The old church holds many memories for me. Both my sons were confirmed in the historic church and one was married there. My husband’s memorial service was held there. I served on the funeral team for 14 years. If a funeral or memorial service was held at the church, I was there making sure the church was ready for the service and cleaning up afterwards. I had joined most of the congregation in voting to secede from the Episcopal Church. 

Eviction was a new experience for me. After this final service we were out in the street with no church home, no prayer books, no Bibles, and no hymnals. We had no crosses, candles, or robes. The funeral team had no pall to cover the casket, no memorial table for the cremains, and no wooden box to hold the cremains. We were allowed to keep the needlepoint kneeler cushions that had been created for the chancel in the historic church. I am very grateful for the kindness and understanding of strangers who took us in and provided a roof that does not leak, heat, and air conditioning to a congregation who had lost their church home. One very bright spot in this ocean of trauma was the lifetime collection of communion silver which a Pennsylvania antique dealer, anticipating our need, donated to our congregation.

After this eviction, I went through a lengthy period of anxiety. Other seniors gave voice to the same anxiety that I was experiencing. Finding my way to new meeting locations and adapting to new routines was exhausting. Our first coffee hour on Sunday morning after the 8 a.m. service was memorable because it was held with no coffee to serve. Gradually, we accumulated necessary supplies, and I began to adjust to the new routines and became more comfortable in new surroundings. On December 31, I attended a memorial service at the historic church. I realized that without the body of Christ, the old building was not the same church that I had attended for 50 years. I do not regret my decision to secede from the Episcopal Church for doctrinal reasons. The church is different, and I am different, and I am not looking back to 2012, only forward to 2013.”

—Caryl Engler